Let’s be realistic. The BrutalMaster - Dirty Chai Cutting Board of Pain is not for your grandmother. It is not for a vegan food blogger. It is for: BrutalMaster - Dirty Chai Cutting Board of Pain...

Most cutting boards require soap and water. The BrutalMaster requires a ritual. Let’s be realistic

To clean this board, you cannot submerge it. Water ruins the spice infusion. Instead, you must: Failure to follow these steps results in the

Failure to follow these steps results in the "Board of Pain" living up to its name—it will warp into a shape resembling a sad taco, rendering it useless for anything except prop comedy.

Here is the truth: The "Pain" is real. After ten minutes of chopping, the board had left micro-abrasions on the belly of our Wusthof. The "BrutalMaster" philosophy is that a knife should be sharpened after every single meal. They sell a companion whetstone (the "Submissive Grit 1000/6000") for $200 separately.

If you hate your knives and love labor, this board is heaven.